My gentle uterus will kick your ass

For whatever reason my girlfriend was a big anime fan growing up, and the other day she decided to revisit her formative years by watching Sailor Moon. Sometime during college she had obtained a season or two of Sailor Moon that weren’t aired in the U.S. (some guy in Canada evidently translated them and then sold them on the sly), so she pops one in and starts watching. Since my desk is right next to the TV, I’ve been halfway watching some of them, too.

I knew that anime could get pretty strange, but I wasn’t prepared. This is my favorite part:

Feminine-looking man (part of a trio of rock stars) wanders onto the scene of a teacher-cum-villain trying to discipline his erstwhile student. Rock star is justifiably pissed off, and decides to do something about it. Fortunately, he has the ability to turn into a Sailor Soldier.

I don’t know how familiar you are with the series, but from what I can gather, Sailor Soldiers are all female. So the dude transforms into a lady. A rather skimpily clad lady. Whatever, I can dig it.

And then he performs his (that is, her) super-power:

Star Gentle Uterus!

If you’re not sure you’re reading that subtitle right, feel free to click the image for a bigger look. And it’s not a funny translation, either. All the super-powers are English words, subtitled because the Japanese don’t really have the same sounds in their repetoire (“Sta Gentarue Utaras!”).

That Sailor Moon follows this up with a Starlight Honeymoon Therapy Kiss seems like a bit of an anticlimax. Once you’ve been hit in the teeth by the gentle uterus, a honeymoon therapy kiss is a walk in the park.

3 responses to “My gentle uterus will kick your ass”

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  1. Mireille says:

    I first saw this attack’s original name in a comic by Chibi Jennifer (moonsticks) and thought it to be merely a joke. But then I watched the series again (reliving my formative years, too :p) and could hardly believe it ^^ Nobody ever mentioned anything about a gentle uterus or therapy kisses in the German translations…

  2. Raihana says:

    (First off, your girlfriend rocks<3)
    I am a really big fan of the manga, the entire anime, I adore it!
    I googled the phrase to see if anyone else thought it was odd. This attack, made by Soldier Star Maker , "Star gentle uterus" sort of stopped me dead in the tracks along with the whole transvestite concept. Don't get me wrong, the oddity makes me love it even more because it makes it interesting unlike other cartoons(call me sick). This particular season of the series is the final one entitled 'Sailor Moon Sailor Stars' and was never dubbed into English or shown in the U.S. as the co-operation who made the English adaptation found the last two seasons to be inappropriate for its intended young audience because of the women's risqué attire, nudity and lesbianism (Sailor Uranus and Sailor Neptune's relationship, along with our tranny Soldiers).
    Even when dubbed in English and other languages, there was never an exact translation because of the Japanese 'raw' nature.

  3. Jen says:

    Uhm well, they’re females disgused in male bodies ^^;

    Source: http://wikimoon.org/index.php?title=Sailor_Starlights

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